Monday, November 23

What if God was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Trying to make his way home...

Sometimes,i wish i weren't so complex...why couldn't i just ..
goto work.crib about no time.cook inedible dinner.crib some more about work.sleep.go back to work..

Options and decisions.. goals and dreams... happiness and contentment..So,whats the point?..of everything ?

can't ever keep from falling apart
At the seams
We'll try to stay blind
To the hope and fear outside
Hey child, stay wilder than the wind
And blow me in to cry
Who do you need, who do you love
When you come undone

Who am i? really ?what do i believe in ??Am i who i think i am ? .. Whats the whole point,again ?

I'm torn
I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed
lying naked on the floor
illusion never changed
into something real
I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
you're a little late
I'm already torn

So much for WTF post for the week.. make that the year !.. Gosh,this is a weird frame of mind to be in ..

I wonder how
I wonder why
Yesterday you told me 'bout the blue blue sky
And all that I can see is just a yellow lemon-tree
I'm turning my head up and down
I'm turning turning turning turning turning around
And all that I can see is just another lemon-tree

I'm sitting here
I miss the power
I'd like to go out taking a shower
But there's a heavy cloud inside my head
I feel so tired
Put myself into bed
Well, nothing ever happens and I wonder

I must tell my brain to shut down for maintenance..For it's own good ;-). Ok,i dunno why that smiley got in there.. this is supposed to be a serious post!!..I dont blame you if you don't understand anything..I don't get a lot of things myself..

Note(s) to self: I mustn't read pseudo-intellectual stuff..unless i am able to assimilate it and/or ignore it as a pile of Crowshit and move on to making inane conversation about finalists of So,you think you can dance or the plot of Blue or the soaring prices of vegetables these days ..I must'nt wonder about people or try to decipher why they do what they do.. I mustn't try to decipher why i do the things i do ...I must'nt think about what people who dont matter to me think about me.. Neither should i kid myself by thinking that what they say wouldnt hurt..Oh yeah,it hurts..I shouldn't dream about what it would feel to be non-dysfunctional.. I should say Fu*k off when i feel like saying it.. even if they are to be directed at someone elderly and especially so when they don't give a fiddlers fa*t about what i feel ..Why did God have to create relatives???..Just to be a pain in the wrong area and most importantly to keep judging you .I must learn to ignore what they say,anyway !

I do realize that its one of "those" days !



Renu said...

God gave us relatives to teach us patience, to balance our lives. Everything in our life is there for a particular reason .

Take care!

AD said...

Wow, 'God being a stranger on a bus', sounds quite real actually. I love your radical ideas, girl! Its my first time here and will surely come back for more :-) Do take a peak at my page when you get a moment.

Bedazzled said...

Renu.. umm .. patience !! the elusive virtue !! thanks !

AD.. welcome in here!! That's one of my fav songs .. whenever i am in a contemplative mood , i go back to that song !! .. looking fwd to cing u more here ! ..hey btw, awesome pics !!! u r amazingly talented !!

Smita said...

Errrr Ummmm...I dunno what to say!!!

I too had a horrible day so all I can say is we are in same boat &lets cheer up :)

vimmuuu said...

Join the cruise lady !!! :D :D :D

I guess its the weather, lol, its ruining us !!

Btw, was this a poem, or a prose or a proem ?? :D :D :D

Bedazzled said...

vimmuu.. u too ? its definitely the climate !! it wasn't anything .. just a bunch of lyrics taken from some of the songs i listened to.. with a lil prose .. so maybe it would qualify as prose ! .. does it have to have a label ??

Deeps said...

Now do you feel better after this venting out?? Then better get back to your funny chirpy self,lady!! You're one of those who I really forward to visiting to cheer myself up!

BTW,how's li'l johnnie doing? :D

Bedazzled said...

Smita.. oops.. my reply disappeared.. umm the weather .. feeling full of sunshine now.. thanx !!!I get like this a bit during Nov-Dec every year !!

Deeps...u made my day !! thanx !! .. i am feeling full of beans and all .. just some grey patches !!

Sorcerer said...

hmm... sad days are good for taking stock of mind has much clarity when we are sad.

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