Sunday, September 26

The poor wife chronicles...




I see a tortured being with a contorted face wrinkled with worry huddled near the computer.

"What's wrong?" I ask "It".

"A man has so many important things to worry about." It says in an open mother-hood statement.

Now motherhood statement is one of those random observations people make without any rhyme or reason.

"What things?" I ask,my interest piqued.

"You won't understand.I am trying to book my tickets for Enthiran-1st day 1st show." The "It" that also happens to be the husband replies.

For people who are clueless about the mention of this movie -Well,Enthiran is the latest sci-fi Rajinikant -Aishwarya starrer thats releasing next week.And Tamilnadu almost gets into a festival-like trance mood during the run-up to the release of Rajini's movies.Yeah,he has God status here.

Of course, i don't understand.I gape open mouthedly as "It" opens 20 different websites of cinema theaters in Chennai followed by a frenzied scribbling of phone numbers.

"Darn!.The buggers are not picking up the phone.What sadists!"."It" says banging the phone in misery.

I cant resist doing the most wifely thing i am capable of.

"Oh crap!.Am i married to a raving psycho who garlands cut outs and whistles madly at theaters?" I ask sanely with an almost Julie Roberts -type earnestness and innocence.

"See, i told you that you won't understand.It's a Thalaivar movie,for godsake.I am going to whistle,do aarti to the movie screen and fall down in reverence in the movie hall.Thaivalaaa..." "It" screams, almost prostrating to the poster of Rajinikanth thats presently appeared on one of the websites.

"Duh." I manage in my most communicative tone and disappear inside because i need a dose of fat to help me face life.

"You just proved that i am right."."It" says as i pile out.

"What?"

" That you are an uncultured girl who can't appreciate the greatness of Thalaivar"."It" says.

"And you are the cultured epitome of entertainment?." I ask cuttingly.

"How can you not appreciate his movies. He is God!.Are you going to help me get a ticket or not?.""It" demands with almost tears in it's eyes,now that most theater guys have told "it' to take a walk as there are no tickets available for first 2 weeks anywhere.

We try to think of possible people who could potentially wrangle a ticket for the wretched being and come up with stupid,improbable suggestions.

"It" blitkriegs friends-family-relatives and random people over phone and regales them with the sob story of how "it" has lost it's purpose in life and that living another 50 years without having seen Enthiran 1st day- 1st show is akin to just existing soullessly.

I have a vague suspicion that most people have not taken this kindly and are going to go all out to avoid us in future.

My parents walk in to partake in the melodrama.

"See this thing you got me married to ?" I declare in exasperation.

Amma just rolls her eyes as if she can't comprehend either of us.Appa nods in acute embarrassment as if he didn't expect this from his almost ivy-league son-in-law.

I am happy because i know that my feelings have been vindicated.

A cousin pops in.Though he doesnt share "it's" enthusiasm for Rajini movies,but eggs "It" on.

"Dont lose hope,da.You can't give up now.We'll somehow get tickets." the cousin says in a scary Deepak Chopra-ish way.

"Freaks!" I mumble.

The air is heavy with the collective despair of 2 people(not mine,of course).A strange,disturbing silence shrouds us.We have no clue how we are going to make this miracle happen.

"I could call my classmate who is the son of xyx theatre.Should i ?" "It" asks suddenly.

"What are you waiting for?"The cousin and I demand incredulously.

"umm.. I haven't spoken to him in at least 10 years."

"oh...How about joining one of those Rajini fan clubs.Anyway you plan to do aarti and garland his cut out.Why not go join a fan club and get a ticket?."

That brilliant suggestion was from yours truly.

"It" rapidly googles "Rajinikant fan clubs" and finds random stuff.But no link that says Rajini fan,please come get your ticket for 1st day-1st show of Enthiran.

"Not working."

"Maybe you should go talk to the auto stand guys.Most auto guys are Rajini fans,right?" I ask.

"Yeah!.But thats a silly idea.""It" says.

I crinkle my face in annoyance.The world never appreciates my genius.

"I got it !.I know how i am going to watch Thalaivar's movie." "It" says with a loopy eureka-ish expression pasted on it's face.

"How?" I ask,eager to know the machinations of "It's " mind.

"I am going to drive down to Pondicherry and use my connections there."

"Great idea,da.I am game."The cousin chimes in.

"Duh." I say and walk out to get my fat-fix to regain my sanity.

What else can one say in desperate times like these.



















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17 comments:

Geeta Mahesh said...

Can't believe there are no tickets, with theaters showing the movie 30-60 times a day.

I was hoping to show my kids a glimpse of Tamil culture on the first day of Rajni show with the whistles and all ...until the Tamil sangam here decided to hike the price to 30$ a ticket from 10$. Will need to find a way out.

SG said...

Very hilarious. Loved the post. We are fortunate. Booked the first show ticket on October 1 in San Jose, California. Not as bad as Houston. The cost is only $20 each. (Regular movie tickets are $10 each).

Just a thought. He may want to go to Pondicherry for the other reason. Ha Ha Ha.

vimmuuu said...

I can understand your hubbys feelings !!! I went through the same during Sivajis release !!! and now for Endhiran, I have no choice, I just cant watch it first day first show ! Sigh !

Guha said...

bedazzled - pls note that everyone that has commented on this thus far has either tried to get hold of 1/1 tickets or is rueing the fact that they could'nt...

Maybe we shld get to the US, rather than Pondy to catch the event. I hear Jet Airways is even offering discount fares for those that have confirmed tickets to catch endhiran in the US

Bedazzled said...

Geeta.. oh,things are insane in chennai.. for the first few weeks we cant even dream of getting a ticket here !!..Wow!! 30 $ for a ticket !!.. but for the hardcore fans it is nothing really

SG..nice !!! have fun and give us your review of the movie.. the idea of getting to pdy for otehr reasons did cross my mind ;-)

Vimmu.. you couldnt gets tckts too? !! lol.. Duh to you too !!

Guha..aiyyo!!! :-)

shuchita said...

Ha ha ha nice post, there is a lot of anticipation in Bombay also about the movie.
thanks for visiting my blog, do visit again and I love your blog name "bedazzled"

rajushank said...

I got tickets for Saturday night :-)

I figured Mayajaal is my best bet, for two reasons: One, they are running 60 shows per day! Two, they are far away from the city, so Mayajaal would be least preferred by the fans in the city. So drove down to Mayajaal (their website is down), the ticket issue told me only front row seats are available. I explained to him, Sir I'm coming with family, the front row will be too noisy with fans. Then he gave me middle row tickets on Saturday night.

Veens said...

haahahhahaha@
Wel Hubby here is also a die-hard fan! I never understood it, but all this mayhem, makes me want to see it too! :D

In the news channel they said the tickets were all books for the 1st 20 days :)

Bedazzled said...

suchita.. am surprised about the anticipation in mumbai. Thanks for dropping by

Rajushank.. nice!!! 60 shows in a day is colossal!!.. have fun..

Veens.. dont really know why thers so much mayhm though..

Dhanya said...

These guys I tell you! They get hyper over the weirdest things :P Don't forget to write a review after seeing the movie.

wordsndreamz said...

lol! Rajini-mania is indeed running high :) It must be a fun situation there, with everybody waiting for the movie :)

Bedazzled said...

Dhanya.. if i get to watch the movie that is ;-)

Wordsndreams.. i dont know about the fun part ... sure is exasperating !!

Priya Iyer said...

Loved it!! Same scene at my house too!! :) Thankfully, the better half had the sense to postpone watching the movie till the ticket prices come down from their current astronomically high perches!

Bedazzled said...

Thanks Priya..good for you that your better half sees sense ;-)

Sound Horn Please said...

hahahahha! I laughed till it hurt when I read your blog. I think thailaivar madness has completely taken over every tamilian currently. Same scene at my home too, though I want to watch Enthiran too.

Bedazzled said...

Soundhorn..ha ha ha !! u too??!!! i am watching it today..hoping that it isnt a big let down !

The Visitor said...

:) Written so well.
PS: Thalaivar thalaivar thaan.